Cockroach

The film 'Team America : World Police' had me crying with laughter, I found it hysterically funny. The film was made by Matt Stone and Trey Parker of South Park fame and is about as reverent. It lampoons anyone and everyone, including themselves. I loved the fictitious 'Film Actor's Guild' led by Alec Baldwin, FAG for short, so that everytime the name of an actor appears on the screen, the letters FAG appear too.

Team America get captured by North Korea's evil mastermind, Kim Jong il who later gets killed by falling from a balcony onto the spike of a Prussian helmet. As Kim Jong il dies, a cockroach emerges from his body and we see that he was only ever a puppet of a higher power.

Until Team America, Kim Jong il had slipped beneath my radar, never had to think about him. Now however, as he is doing the kinds of things that his puppet character would do in Team America : World Police, I CAN only think of him as the marionette who walks as though he has some serious bottom problems and whose spectacles cover his entire face, and of course, who talks like Cartman.

On Independence Day, when the US space shuttle was once again launched after a false start last week, Kim Jong il, anxious presumably to draw attention to himself, launched seven rockets to coincide with the shuttle launch.

Reading the press, little cockroach has few if any allies. He is portrayed like an annoying kid that you want to swat away, and not only that, but one who insists on playing with his willy in the classroom. I can only picture the puppet Kim Jong jumping up and down and saying in Cartman's voice but with an exaggerated Chinese accent,
'I get you George Bush, I get you, you try to attack honolable North Korea and I launch annihilating stlike and nooclear war on you and all amelicans.' Conveniently forgetting that he has already upset Japan, South Korea, China and..well pretty much the rest of the planet.
He's both funny and dangerous at the same time. He should have a sign that can be seen from space at the border to his country saying 'Approach with Caution' except that, well he doesn't really need one. I mean, good god, even the UN are prepared to raise their toothless whiskery head to talk.
And meanwhile, so far, little cockroach has been firing blanks, well not so much blanks as suffering a bit of brewer's droop. The missile fired at Alaska plopped into the sea.

But from what I understand, North Korea is in the same position as a good old-fashioned city under siege. No-one has to do anything but wait it out and ignore him. So long as foreign funds are frozen, so is little cockroach and all he can do is jump up and down on his little wooden puppet legs.

Unless it turns out to be more than just hot air and he really does have nuclear capabilities. Then we'll have to choose who we want to save us, Team America : World Police or FAG? And frankly, even Alec Baldwin may not be able to act his way out of this one.