Friday 16 March 2007

Shazam

In Galloway's today, by the checkout, they had packets of Twiglets and a sign that said, 'The Original Twiglets from Australia, baked, not fried'.
'That's cheeky,' I said, 'Twiglets are from Britain.'
'That's what I thought,' said the assistant.
'Well, they are from Britain,' I said turning the packet over, 'baked in Liverpool.'
'Ah but,' she said, 'it says Victoria Station on it at the bottom.'
'Victoria Station???? That's in London, Victoria Station??'
'Oh, no, Victoria,' she said, 'in Australia.' I looked again.
'?'
'At the bottom, under the barcode,'
'Oh, imported by Menora Foods, Victoria Australia,' I read, 'means they are imported to Australia from Britain and then imported here from Australia.'
'Oh. Oh,' she said, 'I guess I'd better change the sign.'
'Mmmhmmm.'

The honour of the Twiglets must be upheld.

You have not seen anything as spectacular as Vancouver in blossom. Well, unless you live here of course. One day, just regular old fabulously beautiful Vancouver, the next day, Shazam! The Deity has spoken.

I had an incredible afternoon working on my programme. I can't believe that I actually get to spend office time designing this, it's about the equivalent of two lesson plans. In fact, it a sodding sight less complex than a lesson plan because you don't have to work out what Programmes of Study, assessment opportunities, National Curriculum Levels, Foundation subjects KS 3 Framework and a whole slew of other shite it covers. No three-tiered Learning fecking Objectives completely separate from the Learning buggery Outcomes. No differentiation and extension. Well, maybe a couple of extension opportunities. No use of the SNA or the FLA. No homework. And I don't have to do it all in my own time.
Then once you've done it you can use it over and over again.
Unbelievable.
Sweet.

8 comments:

Sleepy said...

Well done on defending the Twiglet and all it's Marmitey wonderousness!

Not doing leson plans in your own time?
It's downright militant!

Schneewittchen said...

It had to be done :)

I know! Unheard of!

Crisp-e said...

Galloway’s, eh? Weird, I went to Belgium on a school trip yesterday and the coach company was called Galloway's!!

I’m with you both on the twiglet front. If twiglets were made in Oz, they would taste like vegemite. In other words, NASTY!

Schneewittchen said...

Hmmm...again, very interesting. I wonder if they were gathering chocolate to sell, they did have a special on Belgian choccie yesterday :)

I know, Vegemite really isn't up to snuff, still, you've got to admire the Aussies for liking Vegemite and Marmite, here they mostly go 'yuk!' Imagine, yuk to Marmite !

Crisp-e said...

Philistines! Marmite rules, it is the king of condiments!!

Schneewittchen said...

I know, and I believe it's a question of education. My writers' group came to my house last Monday and I put out some Marmite. It usually causes discussion. I think one problem is that they don't put butter on their bread and crackers before putting on the next layer.
Now the secret with Marmite is that balance between the yellow buttery layer and the thin Marmitey layer. One guy tried it using the formula and said that it was quite good. Another member who wasn't there has eaten it in Aus as per the formula and likes it.
The first time Kev tried it he slathered it on, with no butter or marg underneath and it made his eyes water.

Crisp-e said...

lol!!! I did that for a dare and it made the roof of my mouth really sore.

Sleepy said...

My Great-Grandmother used to put it on that thick because she couldn't see properly!
My Sister and I ate it because we were too polite to complain but ended up with the sore on the roof of our mouths!