Friday 10 November 2006

Il pleut

If I had to take a cold shower, or even get myself ready to go swimming - even though I love swimming and used to swim in the sea all the time in Pompey, sewage and all - I prevaricate, have to psych myself up. Why is it then that as soon as it starts raining hard I want to rush outside like a large welly-clad duck? Tis a mystery, but it's raining out there and has been all night and inside I'm all smiley and can feel a Gene Kelly coming on.

Dear Lord, how courageous do you have to be to take part in Gay Pride in Jerusalem? There are the men dressed flamboyantly as women that we have come to love and expect from Pride, but in general on the newscast I'm watching, it is less colourful than in Britain or Canada. On t'other hand, the men with beards are out in full force trying to keep Jerusalem holy for the whole world, by this I imagine he means 'find some way to stop Pride' and three thousand bullet-proofed police/troops have been drafted in to deal with trouble. Fortunately they currently look bored, most likely quite a lazy day for Jerusalem.

Clichés are generally clichés because they have either once been true or still are, but Newscaster Roland was not presenting this morning, instead his colleague, whose name I forget was sitting behind the newsdesk.
Like many Frenchwomen, she knows how to present herself. In spite of an overlarge mouth and nose, she has close-cropped hair and perfect choice of dark coloured shirt so that she looks attractive and yet for the life of me I can't see how. I guess it's just a French thing.
And yes, I know that Catherine Deneuve deserves an honourable mention for being both beautiful and French at the same time.

Last night I watched Jay Leno, who I really don't like, I find him lame-arsed and often toe-curlingly gauche. But Sasha Baron-Cohen was on and I was really excited to see him being interviewed as himself. Sadly it was not so. He came on and was interviewed as Borat - very funny of course, but I was mildly disappointed to have sat through a quarter of an hour of Leno being a tosser. He had some 'ordinary Americans' and humiliated them by asking them general knowledge questions. They put up a picture of the Twat of Iran and the people couldn't identify him. One said he was the Prime Minister of Britain. Another said Israel.

I went to Ikea late yesterday afternoon, partly because I hadn't been out all day and partly to get an antidote to the awfulness of adverts for Christmas frippery. Ikea is full of light and good design and I feel lifted just by getting myself into the zone and drifting round it. No horrid little porcelain scenes, no over-decorative tat, no clutter, just clean strong lines and fabulousness.

Sorry, did that sound like an ad? Good-oh.

7 comments:

Sleepy said...

I deserve a Dykea at the end of my road....

Services to the cause people, services to the cause..

Schnee, need I mention 'The Itchy and Scratchy show'?... I should get some Homo-canonisation for that one!

Schneewittchen said...

You are so right, so very right, Saint Sleepy of the Dykiocity, still, not sure you could fit much else into Aliens road.

Sleepy said...

There is that park at the end of the road that does nothing but provide daytime sleeping for the Giro and Tennents (Super strength) Crew.

Schneewittchen said...

Sorted then, I'll start petitioning straight away, think I'll go right to the Swedish government, after all, they stand to make a fortune on extra meatball sales. You do deserve a Dykea, no doubt about it and quite ridiculous that Pompey's nearest is Croydon.

fuziour, wow, that sounds like an actual thing....

Anonymous said...

Looking through the Ikea catalogue sends me into a zone of calm that even the best of meds can't accomplish.
I love swimming too, although that wet, wet feeling does suck. Now, now, Sleepy no need to turn that into some kind of a sexual crack. Well, okay, go ahead. No, really, go ahead.
and sigh, Tall Judy got voted as the new secretary for our union! aaargh!!!!!
- Karen

Anonymous said...

I've heard of students being reprimanded for wearing "Straight Pride" t-shirts and the sort.

Schneewittchen said...

Karen - at Mayhem, and pretty much in most British schools, being a union rep is one of those 'couldn't run fast enough in the other direction' things. No-one wanted to do it so I can never ever remember any competition in it, I guess it's a different thing here.

Adam - well I guess it's a bit like white supremacy, if you say you're proud to be black it's not threatening because black ppl have always been trampled on, if you say you're proud to be white it is quite sinister.
I don't think that gangs of marauding gay youths out 'straight bashing' is too much of a problem outside of the odd episode of some TV show.