Saturday, 20 June 2009

Smiting

The sky is cloudy and lowering but can somehow only manage a few random spots of rain.

If your church doesn't offer wine-tasting, then you're going to the wrong church. I, on the other hand, am going to the right one.
Yesterday evening was a lot of fun, although my doctor probably wouldn't approve of the amount of cheese consumed. The object seemed to be to find wines and cheeses that complement each other. There were some mighty fine examples of both.

One thing I can't do though, is the 'auction as charity event'. After the wine and cheese tasting, bottles of wine and some cheeses were auctioned off. This causes a short circuit to my hard-wired English politeness.
You bid for a bottle of wine, already the price is over what you can buy it for at the Offie, so there's no particular motivation, and then someone else indicates that they want it by bidding against you. OK, so someone else wants the wine, so you do the decent and polite thing and step back.
I find it better not to play.

Didn't make it to Ikea, in order to be able to drive, I had to literally just taste, and then poured the rest of mine into Kevin's glass, thus he was tired, but merry enough, and I was just....tired.
Never fear though, I had had the one dollar breakfast there, having gone in during the morning for coffee, and had bought lunch from the downstairs 'bistro', to have at work. I think that fulfills my needs AND obligations.

So, last week at church, one of the ladies that leads the prayers told me I should volunteer to do that. Apparently you have to compile a list of people and stuff to pray for. Personally, I can see a return to good old-fashioned smiting with me getting to lead. She was also complaining that people don't really listen, which would be an advantage too I feel. I'd have them entreating God to smite the enemies of Israel, that'd take care of a whole bunch of undesirables, including sorting out the current unrest in Iran, smite the misogynists and homophobes, so that'd be the Pope out of the picture, then I'd get down to the nitty-gritty. Smite the people who chuck litter out of their car windows, talk on their phones whilst driving and don't corner properly, then finally, I'd tidy up the whole grammar situation, smite those who use adjectives instead of adverbs, use the wrong prepositions and make up their own past participles.
I'd just call it a return to family values. Seemed to work for the Tories.

4 comments:

bozo5 said...

What about smiting the intolerant people too! They really annoy me!

;-)

Sleepy said...

Smite the prick who nearly had me off my bike.

Schneewittchen said...

Bozo - they're just diabetics, leave them alone.

Sleepy - Consider him smitten!

Anonymous said...

a mumma i saw those flowers in B&Q yesterday (sometimes Oli likes to go and play with the doorbells endlessly) and I tried looking for seeds but alas! - well its ok because you have them! love you xx