Thursday, 14 August 2008

Teddies

My friend Michael feels there should be more pictures of flowers on the blog, so here's some heather growing in the swamp.
Or maybe it was fewer.
Yes, I think he wanted fewer pictures of flowers. So here's a picture of some dead leaves.

I receive e-mails notifying me of vacant job positions in my area of expertise. Or in fact not my area of expertise but the one I happen to be working in anyway.
This is why I received an advert today for two vacancies for dog sled instructors.

Job ads here always slay me (pun fully intended)because they ask for ridiculous qualifications for jobs that pay very little.
For example, to be a dog sled instructor, you have to work 40 hours a week, "weekends, day and night", and amongst other qualifications, skills and general god-like status, and believe you me there was a very long list, you need, "Some university, Credentials (certificates, licences, memberships, courses, etc.):
Cardiopulmonary Resuscitation (CPR) Certificate, Emergency Medical
Response Wilderness Certificate, Orienteering Training". You also had to supervise 5 - 10 people and for this you would be paid from $350 - 577 per week, so in effect, fuck all.

The bears seem to be out of control here at the moment. A couple of days ago a lady was hospitalised when a bear attacked her while she was working in her garden. She said she could feel it biting the back of her head.
Yesterday, a bear walked into someone's house in North Vancouver, had a look around and then hunkered off to mosey down a street 'where many children live'.
Oh Goldilocks, where are you now?
The bear was shot of course.
Naturally people don't want to be attacked by bears, because they know they are big, fierce, people-eating creatures, but they also don't want them to be shot because they are furry, cuddly creatures. Thus the signs on the bear-proof garbage cans in the mountains, 'A fed bear is a dead bear'.

In French-related news, I have a couple of communication dead zones. I never recognise the word when either of them say 'e-mailing', I always think they are telling me about someone called 'Ammeline'. This because apparently the French word 'le courriel' is not cool.
Likewise, I am trying to get the lad to be able to pronounce the words 'hungry' and 'angry' differently. Also, to not pronounce the word 'bite' in the same way as the French word (same spelling) for penis.

The Tali-tubbies have killed a woman who used to work for our city. Apparently the Press and Media in general are going to be hounding everyone for some comment. We are not to comment. Oh well maybe I can, since I don't actually work for the city, I just have a city e-mail and thus receive such instructions.
I won't hold my breath.
Although I may make some damning comment about the Tali-tubbies and their misogyny.

3 comments:

bozo5 said...

Thank you for incorporating reader feedback in your blog.

You are correct, the request was for few pictures of flowers. I thought that was made abundantly clear. But my hat is off to you for sticking with your theme and ignoring your fans requests. It is one of your wonderful traits!

Schneewittchen said...

Michael, Michael, Michael, you are far too fulsome in your praise, I am not worthy. Fans, I had no idea.

Btw, fan's (the requests of one fan)or fans' (the requests of multiple fans). However, an absent apostrophe is infinitely better than an inappropriate one.

Sleepy said...

I'm curious, how does your student pronouce 'Cheese eating surrender monkey'?
Get him to practice it, it may help with tricky english vowel sounds!