Thursday, 7 January 2010

The Vortex

Two of my lads, last month. Breaking their mother's heart.

Tomorrow is the new moon, but it doesn't look the way you expect it to.

My days and evenings are now taken up with the trivia of my life. The lists - micro-cleaning, watering - yes watering, in spite of the recent rain, the balcony boxes remain bone dry, the bulbs will not sprout; listen to the news in French, in German, read something in Spanish, improve the shining hour, walk the dog.
Time somehow fills itself.

The BIG questions need to be answered.
Why, when Graham Norton has Hollywood stars on, are they like corpses? They sit there, hardly joining in, letting Graham do all the work.
'You're great,' says Mickey Rourke, 'you make us feel so relaxed.
Too relaxed bozo.
I loved you in 'The Wrestler', superb performance, professional, skilful, well-crafted, but why is your hair hanging in greasy strands across your face? And just get inflamed by Jessica Biel from the other end of the sofa, if you must at all, don't keep pawing her.
And that other woman, the one who couldn't pronounce 'Greenland', she didn't want to sit on your lap.
Oh Mickey.

I sit down to watch TV5 while eating my lunch, and nearly get sucked in to Maury. Maury has a psychic detective, how can I resist a psychic detective? But I stay strong, I've been here before, your whole life can disappear into the telly before you can say, 'Anne Robinson.'

The dog walking has a gentle etiquette. The Chinese people always observe the etiquette, allow the dogs to approach, sniff, each owner reminds their own dog of their expectations, then the socialising is over and the dogs, through their owners' mouths, say goodbye. It works even if one of you doesn't speak English.
The Anglos are a bit more random, they may or may not do the dog dance.

God save the Queen.

7 comments:

karemay said...

Funny, but I was watching Psychic dectives on the 'crime network' as I was reading your blog. I find it fascinating. Having been at home for a while now, I certainly have become addicted to the sort of TV I wouldn't normally watch.
I felt the same way when Ian started smoking, fortunatly it was just a phase and it didn't last long. I'm sure Laurence & Ben will grow out of it. Matt, thank goodness has nevr started.

Schneewittchen said...

It's just too easy isn't it?

I certainly hope you're right about the smoking, a phase I'd like to see ended as soon as possible before it becomes much too difficult.

Sleepy said...

Dear Whisky's Mum.

You always know the name of the dog but hardly ever the owner.

Schneewittchen said...

Welcome back you lotus eater! I look forward to grand tales of the Maldives:))

Sleepy said...

I only had a falling out with 1 German couple and a French twat... Not bad for me.
Although, French twat did cause the 'Red Mist' to descend and almost caused Piracy and the re-taking of Calais!

Schneewittchen said...

That was incredibly restrained of you! Calais's such a dump these days, I really think it would be more trouble than it's worth to take it back.

Dawn said...

The boys have turned into men.