Thursday 16 July 2009

Saints

The UK Passport Office, I've said it before, and I'll say it again, are a shining example of how a government organisation should work, polite, helpful and efficient, the Normans who conquered Britain in 1066 and who introduced wholesale bureaucracy would be proud.
Ben now has a passport.
Now he has to get here, via Calgary.

Which puts me in mind of Saint Christopher, the patron saint of travellers. Now, generally speaking, I can see why they ended up as the patron saint of this or that, St. Francis was, fairly obviously, a bit of an animal lover, and Saint Christopher carried the Christ child across a river, so there we go, which is just as well, because if it were all a bit arbitrary, like Ministers being given portfolios, then woe unto Saint Chris, since Transport is the bum rap. Been a naughty boy or girl? Well then, it's Transport for you, now off you go and stand in a corner.

One exception to the rule that springs to mind, (saints, not ministers), is Saint Sebastien, patron saint of athletes, I dunno somehow, I think patron saint of homo-erotic art may be more appropriate.

The British comic in this clip is an atheist, and I have nowt against atheists, this one makes a case - all tongue in cheek of course (or is it?) for Jesus being gay.

I braved the Richmond roads by bicycle today. Holy Carp. On the one hand, yes, there is the ability to freely swear at passing motorists, and in fact you have to, since it offends them to have cyclists on their roads and they toot and lean out of the windows of their badly driven cars, and hurl abuse at you.
Which puts me in mind of being horrified, not long after arriving here, at a motorist driving in the cycle lane (most of Richmond doesn't have these, but this stretch did),behind a Sikh gentleman who was cycling along, yep, IN THE CYCLE LANE, and beeping repeatedly at the man.
Arsehole.

The final insult today was when waiting to turn left into the car park of the church - being ridiculously unwilling to simply cut across the oncoming traffic - an idiot comes up behind me and starts beeping. So now they know that Christians have the foulest mouths and hand gestures of any religion, a skill, I feel, we should be justly proud of.

I was calmed by hearing about Saint Henry of Finland, who converted the pagan Finns, but got into a spot of bother for excommunicating some vicious thug for...well, vicious thuggery, which point he demonstrated ably to St. Henry, by following him out onto the icy wastes and splitting his head open with an axe.
Hmm, perhaps the original psycho axe murderer.
No idea why this calmed me.

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